An email from arls

http://peyups.com/article.khtml?sid=4377Intindihan at AntayanContributed by jenga (Edited by arwen) Saturday, July 05, 2008 @ 11:02:15 AM


Parang naiintindihan ko na.
O ito lang ang gusto kong isipin.
Ayaw mo kong masaktan. Ayaw mong makita akong malungkot. Pero ayaw mo rin sa ¡kin. O sige, correction... hindi mo kayang maging kung anong gusto kong maging ka sa buhay ko. Quote na lang kaya kita? Sorry, Jeng, hindi ko kayang maging ganoon sa¢ yo.
Ikaw naman kasi. Bakit mo pa ba kailangang sabihing gusto mong isauli 'yung sulat na binigay ko sa ¡yo noong umamin ako? Bakit mo pa sinabing nalulungkot ka tuwing babasahin mo yon? Bakit mo pa sinabing naaawa ka sa ¡kin?
Ako naman kasi. Bakit ko pa kailangang i-probe kung bakit ka naaawa sa kin? Bakit ba pa kita binigyan ng sulat na magpapalungkot sa ¡yo eh ayaw ko din namang nakikitang malungkot ka. Bakit ko ba ¡to ginawa sa friendship natin? Bat ba kasi ang hirap-hirap na hindi umasa?
Ikaw kasi ulit eh. Nung sinabi ko sa ¡yo na nagkakaganito na ¡ko, na may symptoms na ko kaya lumayo ka na, ayaw mo namang lumayo. 'Yan tuloy, yung ideya na kahit na alam mo na, nakikipag-close ka pa din sa ¡kin, led me on. Masama nga raw mag-expect pero ang hirap hindi eh. Paano ba gawin yung wag isiping baka may nararamdaman din sa ¡yo ang isang taong lapit pa rin nang lapit kahit alam na niya kung anong nangyayari sa ¡yo tuwing andyan siya?
O sige. Ako kasi ulit. Hindi pa ¡ko nasanay. Ilang beses ko ba kailangang dumaan sa ganito? I mean, alam mo yung mga nakaraan ko. Kaya nga ang sagot mo kung bakit ka naaawa sa ¡kin eh dahil pagkatapos nung mga yon, hindi mo inisip na ikaw din pala magagawa mo. Na paiyakin ako. Pero hindi mo gusto. Alam ko yon. Alam ko mahal mo ¡ko. Hindi nga lang sa paraang gusto ko.
Natatandaan mo pa ba nung iniyakan mo pa yung kaibigan ko? Sabi ko sa ¡yo, you don¢t always get what you want but you¢ll definitely get what you deserve. Nakakainis, ipapayo ko yun sa sarili ko. For the nth time. Pero di ba sasaya din ako? Hindi pala. Sasaya din ako! Hindi nga lang siguro sa iyo, pero I¢ll get what I deserve. Hindi naman ako masamang tao kaya siguro may magandang naghihintay para sa akin. Sana sigurado. At yun na lang ang iisipin ko ¡no?
Tama. Ayaw mo kong masaktan. Ayaw mo kong malungkot. Pero hindi mo kayang maging kung anong gusto kong maging ka sa buhay ko. Alam mong nasasaktan ako ngayon pero alam mong mas mabuti ¡to kesa sumulong tayo sa lebel na hindi para sa ¡tin kung saan baka mas lalo pa tayong magkasakitan.
So parang naiintindihan ko na nga. Hindi mo kasalanan. Hindi ko kasalanan. Walang may kasalanan. Lesson ¡to. Experience. I¢m just glad I¢m going through this with you.
Okay lang naman siguro kung medyo weird ako for a while ¡no? Ayoko pa ring iwanan yung pagkakaibigan natin. It¢s the best gift you¢ve ever given me. And if only for that, I¢d be honored to go back to being your old normal friend.
Sana pagbalik ko, andyan ka pa din. Tapos isang araw, pag-uusapan natin ¡to, tatawa na lang tayo. Darating din ¡yung isang araw.
So dyan ka lang. Babalik din ako.
At gusto kong isipin: Naiintindihan mo din. ###############---- editor's note: pasensiya na marami taglish pero methinks essential siya sa piece - arwen

THE GOOD GUYS/Email received from lovely Issay

let this be a lesson for us women...
__________________________________________
The good guysSource: The Manila TimesBy: Mark J. Macapagal

I've received a lot of e-mails where people mention that I do not think inthe manner typical for most men. They comment that I'm sensitive topeople's feelings, observant, communicative, determined, caring, etc.Whileit's true I do believe I possess these qualities to some degree, what Ifind odd is that I find quite a number of women say that it's rare. ThatI'm supposed to be some sort of oddball male, totally unlike the cads andjerks that they've been dating all their lives. Thing is, I'm pretty sureI'm not rare at all. I just think that people have this tendency to lookinthe wrong places.

A group of women that I worked with at my old computer company were havinglunch one day and I sat down with them, just in time to catch the middleofa tirade against my gender. My co-workers went on and on about how menjustwanted "one thing," never treated them right, and that there were no goodhusbands to be had anymore. No one who would be faithful, loving and agoodprovider, basically, was what I caught from their conversation.Eventually,they naturally focused on me, the male at the table, and were waiting formy input so that they could refute it and continue moaning about thedecline of eligible bachelors. I finished my sandwich and then said, "No,there are plenty of good guys. Like Doug, for instance..." "Doug?"one woman questioned. "That quiet, bookish fellow in database? He's soboring." At this point, I interjected, "Yeah, he might be, I don't know.But the thing is, you're all wailing about finding good men and you'relooking for them in bars, parties, discos, wherever. Hasn't it occurred toyou that any of the guys you meet in these settings are probably not themarrying kind?"

The table was quiet so I continued, "You see, if you want the stable,faithful, consistent men, you have to look at the accountants, thebookkeepers, these men. I think it stands to reason that it's the men wholead quiet, comfortable lives are the ones who would make the bestpartners. Since you're looking for good conversation, I would think theguys who spend their time reading books instead of drinking beer andplaying cards would be the better bet. Family values your thing? Then Isuppose the guy who's active in his parish would be the ticket for that.""But that's kind of boring, I don't want that," another woman said. "Well,that is right," I answered. "But there you go again. If you're attractedtothe power broker who drives a Porsche and picks up women every night, whatmakes you think that this man will be sensitive and caring to your needs?You like the guy who takes you to all the hot spots in town? Haven't youthought that for him to know all the hot spots, he's probably been goingtoall of them already with women other than yourselves?" "See, the excitingguys, the `bad boys'?" I said. "Yeah, make no mistake, they are a hell ofalot more fun than going out with the geeks. But you are running the highrisk of falling for someone that's not going to treat you as well as you'dlike. So you go for the `bad boys' and you keep this silly little notioninyour head that they're going to change because of you when really, they'renot going to. And when your relationship comes to its inevitable, bloodyend, you call the guy was a jerk and a cheat but, if you think about it,hewas already that when you met him. So what's the big surprise then?"

The table was pretty silent after that. I guess they were expecting me tobeeasy pickings, or to simply concede to their girl power affirmationsession. In the end, I think they did realize the truth in what I said.Later, one would tell me that her past relationships were littered withmusicians, artists, race car mechanics, etc, and not one "smart pick" inthe bunch, was how she put it. I suppose I'm just saying that if you keepto alemon grove, you're going to keep picking lemons. That if all the men inyour circle are of a certain type (that you don't like), then it's time toexpand your circles. Because I think you'll see, there's a lot out thereonce you make it out of your comfort zone and start looking at those youmight never have looked at before.